1. You must always believe in long-termism.

I saw with my own eyes a guy who ran 5 kilometers every day, spent no more than 10 yuan on meals, did 200 push-ups every night, and lost 100 jin (110 lbs) over his entire senior year of high school. I also saw a girl everyone called aimless who edited her own beauty videos every day and achieved financial freedom right after graduation.

Long-termism + something valuable = an unstoppable person.

As Li Xiaolai said: valuable things are worth doing slowly, worth spending enough time on.

2. Be bolder at work, speak with more confidence. If you mess up, you mess up. If it’s not done well, it’s not done well.

Don’t be afraid. Don’t be timid and terrified at some crappy job—it doesn’t matter.

Shake off that “good kid” image. Make people feel like you’re not someone to mess with, that you have your boundaries. Every now and then, subtly but unmistakably, show a bit of your strength—financial means, real skills.

Learn to slack off. That way any job feels easy, stress-free, and you actually enjoy it while time flies. Not being able to pass the buck is fine, but never take the blame. Be non-stick—that’s what makes you a seasoned veteran.

3. Don’t be too sensitive to the outside world—it’s all man-made. Its purpose is to tempt you, drain you, sacrifice you. Everything about making you successful, making you materialistic, making you follow the rules—they’re all concepts, all games, all movies. If you take them seriously, you’ll either live in fear or charge in naked with everything you’ve got, becoming a lamb to the slaughter.

A human being is, at its core, a bundle of consciousness. If you’re too sensitive to external information, too sensitive to other people’s instigation, too sensitive to so-called opportunities, you’ll most likely make mistakes.

When you stop chasing success, stop thinking about making big money, stop caring about what others think of you, the outside world won’t weigh so heavily on you. Instead, you’ll value yourself more, appreciate yourself more. If you can get thick-skinned enough that the more people dislike you, the more you like yourself—then congratulations, you’ve found the true meaning of freedom. Because freedom, at its core, is being disliked by others.

4. Let me tell you a hidden truth.

Whether in friendship or love, when you settle for less in someone, you’re backstabbing yourself. The fact that you can tolerate them only proves you have the capacity to do so.

It absolutely does not mean they are a good person. In other words, this is ultimately a test that screens you, not them.

Put it nicely: you’re capable, you can lower your standards for others. But to put it bluntly: you have no threshold.

And if you keep settling for less, the other person will just get used to it and think it’s their own merit.

Because anyone with an ounce of self-awareness wouldn’t so freely accept someone else’s kindness.

5. What I have lost was never mine to begin with. What I seek is what traps me. Everything in the world can be used by me, but nothing can be owned by me. To have no desires is to be strong; to do nothing is to leave nothing undone. All are external possessions—you cannot own them, you can only experience them. If you fixate on whether you gain or lose, that’s where the problem lies. There are only two things you focus on: what you have and what you don’t.

You cannot truly possess anything external. Everything arises through causes and conditions; everything ceases through causes and conditions. You are merely using this body and mind to experience it. If you cling to it, trying desperately to hold on, you will drift further from truly possessing it. The closest thing to true possession is to experience it fully.

6. Without execution, good ideas are worthless.

Input alone won’t produce results. What actually produces results is action. Just like how earning a bit more money today brings you one step closer to buying a car or a house.

There are two ways to get good input: one is to accumulate experiences, the other is to gather information gaps and then replicate others’ successful methods.

7. When you’re in a bad state, force yourself to dress nicely every day, put on light makeup, go out more, move around more, meet all kinds of people, hear all kinds of opinions, eat food you’ve never been able to stomach.

By forcibly changing your physical environment, let your mind gradually follow your circumstances. Bit by bit, you’ll be surprised to find that shifting your mindset isn’t so hard. The world is full of fascinating things, and we are so small—not even a speck of dust in the universe.

Once you taste the sweetness of forcing your own mindset to shift—when you suddenly realize you feel a bit better—you can gradually take control and reach the point where your circumstances follow your mind.

8. When you don’t interact with people, your emotions are most stable. Your emotions change depending on who you’re with.

Some people speak just to provoke you, to look down on you. Of course your emotions will spiral—either depression and anxiety, or irritability and rage.

Some people affirm you, encourage you, overestimate you. Of course your spirits will lift, you’ll feel comfortable, you’ll feel joy.

Your emotional instability is entirely because of others—it’s not your fault. So either enjoy solitude, or accept only the people who make you feel good.

9. Don’t wrestle with anyone, anything, or any relationship. If you don’t cling, you’ll be calmer, more at ease, more composed. Unmoved by favor or disgrace, watch the flowers bloom and fall before the courtyard; indifferent to coming or going, gaze at the clouds roll and unfold across the sky. To accept what cannot be changed and be at peace with it as fate—that is a realm only the wise can reach.

In every moment, you should: do your best and leave the rest to heaven. Go with the flow as a premise, and give it everything you’ve got as the execution. Otherwise, idly watching the drifting clouds and falling petals will only leave you with regrets.

10. Feng Tang once said: If you don’t want to get cancer, or want to lower your risk—especially for women, breast cancer, ovarian cancer, cervical cancer—you have to let loose. You have to be a bit of a jerk. Strengthen your heart until it’s tough as nails, and your chances of getting cancer will drop.

Here, I’m reminded of an old saying: “No heart, no lungs—live without fatigue.” (Carefree and care-less, life gives you less stress.) ❤️❤️

11. A person’s whole life is about living with yourself, marrying yourself, sleeping with yourself, being alone with yourself. Block out any external person or thing that drains you. What business is it of yours? What business is it of theirs? Sort out your own mental neijiao (internal friction), save up money diligently, don’t buy things you don’t need, consume rationally. Work hard to improve yourself and create passive income—then you’ll have a certain sense of ease, and that mental state is incredibly comfortable.

12. I came across this passage:

“No matter what you do, you must do your best to do it well. In the process of trying, you will surely learn something, and over time, your life will undergo a qualitative change. If you just half-ass your way through, you may gain nothing—and worse, your attitude toward everything will become half-assed, and you’ll waste precious time. The way you treat life is the way life will treat you.”

13. Many people spend a long time trying to accept people they find hard to accept. But there’s another possibility in life: choosing. If you’ve spent a long time struggling and still can’t accept someone, to the point of attacking yourself and tearing yourself apart—why can’t you accept it?

This kind of thing, stretched out too long, will drive you into depression. Why not take a different path: accept that right now you can only do this much, and choose other people instead. This is respect for your own uniqueness.

14. People die. After death, you can’t do anything. In a few decades, no one will remember you. So while you’re alive, cut loose.

15. Professor Luo Xiang said: “If you come from a troubled family, being a few steps behind is already impressive. Don’t blame yourself—because while others were growing up, you were still stuck in the neihao (internal friction) of your family. While others were building their careers, you were still trying to build yourself. Break free from the internal friction.”

Everyone has a different starting point. We can’t choose our family of origin, but we can choose how to reshape it.

16. A soft-hearted person is a fortune-less person. Soft-heartedness may seem magnanimous but is actually foolish; it may seem kind but is actually weak. Being soft-hearted and unable to say no will only destroy you. Rational ruthlessness and coldness are the real tools for survival.

17. The greatest pain people experience comes from interacting with others and following rules.

Life has no inherent meaning—it’s just a 30,000-day experience. Wherever you are, you’re just passing through, like playing a game. Don’t live in someone else’s game.

18. Always remember the ugly side of a person. Don’t soften just because of a few nice words—otherwise, everything you suffer is what you deserve. The most immature thing an adult can do is forgive the past the moment they feel happy. The good side might have been an act, but the bad side is real.

19. Dunganli (emotional insensitivity) + shielding power = invincible in life.

Don’t pry into other people’s lives. Don’t speculate about what others are thinking. Don’t get stuck in the past or worry about the future. Any person or thing that causes you neihao (internal friction)—don’t give it even a second thought.

Give your time and energy back to yourself. Hold your ground amid fame and fortune, and walk confidently amid the worldly gaze.

Translation: None of my business, none of your business = peace in life.

20. Whatever you do, don’t coast. You make 5,000 yuan a month, 60,000 a year. Coast from 20 to 30 and you’ve coasted through 600,000, with maybe 20% saved at most. There’s no difference between a day of coasting and a day of effort—but in two or three months, you’ll see a different vibe. In three to five years, you’ll see completely different life paths.

We’re all born ordinary, so we have to fight from the bottom and work hard to make ourselves shine.

Be that dazzling star. ❤️❤️

21. When people call you stubborn, it means they can’t PUA you. When they say you have a bad attitude, it’s usually because they can’t out-argue you on logic, so they attack your attitude instead. When they call you selfish, it’s mostly because they can’t take advantage of you. When they question your morality, it’s often because what you did was perfectly reasonable and legal—they can’t find a real fault, so they invent a moral one.

Remember: most of the time, when people criticize you or blame you, there’s a self-serving logic behind it.

Don’t let others’ accusations cause you anxiety. Remember: different positions, different interests. That’s all there is to it.

22. A woman, if she can cultivate herself to the point where:

Men see her without impure thoughts, only respect; Children naturally gravitate toward her like a warm spring breeze; The elderly look at her with tenderness, as if meeting an old friend; Even small animals pause near her, unafraid and untroubled—

Then she has surely endured countless trials and hardships. She is no longer an ordinary mortal. Her energy field has become extraordinarily pure.

And all of this requires immense blessings and fortune, as well as hellish refinement.

23. Don’t pity anyone. True compassion is letting things happen as they should. Don’t think you can be anyone’s savior—you can’t interfere with others’ destiny.

There is no truly pitiable person under heaven. When someone is labeled as pitiable, you can always find the other side—the detestable things they did to get there.

Pitiable people in society develop a consensus of seeking externally: “I am pitiable, you must sympathize with me.” Instead of seeking internally—being strong yourself is the core of solving problems, and then you might even have strength left to help others.

24. A passage that recently healed me: “I say I want to bailan (let it rot), but I don’t actually mean doing nothing. I mean I hope to loosen up a bit, not put too much hope in a distant future, not care about others’ opinions. I hope to become the kind of person who lives only for today.”

“Real progress is not anxious self-doubt, but calm self-acceptance. It’s not being driven by dissatisfaction with yourself, but being drawn by beautiful goals, patiently waiting for them to bloom and bear fruit, trusting that growth will happen naturally.”

25. If you want others to help you in your time of need, there’s a prerequisite: they must feel you’re useful and will surely rise to success in the future. It’s precisely because of that expectation that people will extend a hand when you’re down. If they know full well you’re a lost cause and still expect someone to help you—either you’re a fool, or they are.

26. No matter what group you’re in, if you lower yourself too much trying to get along with everyone, you will be sorely disappointed.

In this world, people may verbally sympathize with the weak, but when it’s time to choose a partner, they always pick the strong. Only by constantly improving yourself and becoming more valuable can you gain true connections—people will naturally gravitate toward you.

27. If someone says a couple of things and you can’t take it, can’t eat or sleep over two sentences—how fragile are you? You need to understand: what can disturb you is often your own excessive concern. What can hurt you is often your own inability to let go. If you are at peace, no one can disturb you.

28. A soft-hearted person is a fortune-less person. Soft-heartedness may seem magnanimous but is actually foolish; it may seem kind but is actually weak. Being soft-hearted and unable to say no will only destroy you. Rational ruthlessness and coldness are the real tools for survival.

29. People who love to argue will never have good luck.

No matter what anyone says, these people habitually negate the other person and play devil’s advocate, trying to show off their own sense of existence and worth.

Always trying to one-up others in words is a low-level communication habit—and the killer of all relationships. Truly smart people constantly restrain their urge to rebut, turning refutation into reflection, replacing argument with silence.

30. Right now, stop. Look around you. Blink your eyes. Touch your own arm.

First: as long as you are alive and healthy, the only fact is that you are alive and healthy right now, and you can perceive everything around you. Nothing else is real.

Second: everything in your head—what to do tomorrow, who was unkind to you before, what’s been bothering you lately, and the emotions that arise from them—all of it is just a trick in your mind. False.

All peace comes from the first point. Peace comes from the fact that as long as there is no physical pain, nothing is really wrong with you. Observe the world like a deity, calmly.

All suffering comes from the second point. Suffering comes from living in the false realm of thoughts, tormenting yourself within a dream.

This is the key to peace and joy in life.